Unlike husband N R Narayana Murthy, the founder chairman of Infosys, Sudha Murty, 54, spells her surname without the letter 'h'. She also bubbles with enthusiasm, while Narayana, 58, is more reserved, especially in public and with those he does not know intimately. Sudha is forthright and outspoken to the point of bluntness, while Narayana reserves his aggression for the boardroom. But for over 25 years, these two very different people have shared life's journey. "If someone had told me that my life would be like this, I would have been scared!" exclaims Sudha.
Agreeing to disagree
The Murthys are two individuals, united by destiny. Sudha is the idealist Narayana more circumspect and tolerant to others. "She expects everybody to be perfect," he says. " I tell her the world is imperfect but she doesn't agree." The couple may often argue about this, but neither expects the other to change.
"I am brutally honest. Murthy is more diplomatic, but I am a very blunt person. Of course, people may say it's because I can afford to be frank, but" Sudha trails off. Is there any instance where she has been economical with the truth? "Yes, once I was visiting an Adivasi family and they insisted I have some tea or coffee. I knew it would be a burden on them, so I said I don't take tea or coffee. But they insisted. I was about to ask for a glass of water when I spotted the
nallah outside their hut and I thought to myself, 'What if I contract dysentery or typhoid?' Then I was about to ask for milk instead, when I realised that would be something they could ill afford. So I simply said, 'I don't take tea or coffee and I am allergic to milk'."
Usually, though, Sudha is crystal clear in matters of communication, especially now that the Murthys are much sought after to add badge value to weddings and housewarming ceremonies. "Take wedding invitations for instance," she says. "I believe in being straightforward. 'I will attend if I am in town' is what I tell people. Murthy, for professional reasons, will always be more careful and guarded."
"I wouldn't put it quite that ways," Narayana demurs. "Let's say I can disagree with people without being disagreeable." So is he the consummate diplomat? "I am a totally transaction-based person," he candidly admits. "Data and facts are all that matter to me; I don't carry any ideological baggage about people."
How do they resolve their differences? "Some things are difficult to resolve, so we always operate in a state of unstable equilibrium," Narayana says. "But there are so many 'touch points,' so many occasions when you come so close, that distance brought about by differences of opinion and the pressures of work does not matter."
Getting Connected
The Murthys' journey began in 1970, when a common friend introduced then in Pune. Narayana had moved there to start a systems research institute, while Sudha, an alumna of the Indian Institute of Science, worked with Telco, now Tata Motors. "She was brilliant, and pretty," Narayana recalls. " I wonder what she saw in me." Sudha was already a trailblazer, having challenged the Tata Group's policy of male-only engineers by writing to J R D Tata himself.
The couple began to date - but Sudha wouldn't quite describe it that way. "In those days, there was no such thing as a 'date'," she emphatically clarifies. "We spent time together, but always with common friends. It is difficult to ascertain when our feelings for each other began to change." But the chemistry was undeniable. "We would paint the town red," says Narayana. On their nights out, he'd often borrow money from Sudha. "She'd be surprised at how shameless a fellow could be!"
The duo spent much of their free time together watching movies. "He likes Neetu Singh and Dharmendra, while I am a big fan of Sanjeev Kumar. Our favourite movie is Abhimaan with Amitabh and Jaya. We watched it twice in one day; from 12 to 3, and then again from 3 to 6," she confesses with a chuckle. Besides movies and listening to music - he likes Mozart, Strauss and Beethoven, while she prefers Hindustani classical vocalist Bhimsen Joshi - the couple enjoyed dining out, and still do. "But not so much in five-star hotels," Sudha clarifies. "MTR, the famous Mavalli Tiffin Rooms near Lalbagh, is a favourite. Murthy always says this five-star food all tastes the same; there is nothing to beat anna-saaru (rice and rasam) at home."
Starting up
In September 1976, Narayana proposed to Sudha in an auto rickshaw. "He told me that he could not give me money, only a happy and comfortable life," she recalls. It took her family time to accept the fact; Sudha's family - her father was a university professor, her brother an MTech from IIT Delhi and her sister an MSc in Physics from IIT Chennai - were worried about Narayana's prospects. However, the couple were eventually married in February 1978 at his house in Bangalore. The wedding was a simple affair, costing Rs 800, with the couple pooling in Rs 400 each.
After several brief stints in the US, where they shuttled between Boston and New York struggling to make inroads in the complex world of IT, the couple moved to Mumbai, set for an ordinary, middle-class life. " A two-bedroom apartment and a scooter was all I wanted," Sudha remembers. "After all, we were a couple steeped in our work and our books."
But life had other plans. Narayana started Infosys in 1981, with the Indian equivalent of a $250 investment (Rs 10,000 at the time) and a vision to change the way the world viewed Indian software. Initially, things didn't come easy and Sudha was the breadwinner. After a series of jobs and making do with what was available, she eventually shifted base to Bangalore with her husband.
No regrets
Although both were hands on at Infosys in the start-up phase, Narayana decided that only one person in the family should work there - the other had to look after the home and children. Sudha elected to become homemaker, a decision that was tough at the time.
Today, she has no regrets. "His dreams were larger than any success I could have had in a career," she generously admits. "She has no grouses," acknowledges Narayana. "I am a little unfair; I always want to be in the driver's seat." Sudha agrees, saying, "Making sacrifices comes more easily to me. But we are not bound by archaic rules of marriage."
"Sudha can relate to a broad spectrum of people," says Narayana with pride. And she has continued living life on her terms, as teacher at Bangalore's Christ College, writer, philanthropist and chairperson of the Infosys Foundation, a charitable body. "I love teaching," she says. " I have lots of patience and I cherish the moments I spend with my students."
The downside to success has been less time for each other and their children - daughter Akshata, 24, and son Rohan, 20. " Not going out much together has been one of the lows of our lives," Narayana rues. Sudha does miss the man who had time for music and Abhimaan. But she says, "We have never made him choose between his work and us. To build an empire like Infosys, a grand passion is necessary."
Feet on the ground
Along with passion comes simplicity, which helps the couple retain their balance. Narayana's office at the sprawling Infosys campus may be the last word in gadgets and gizmos, but computers and music systems are the only indulgences in their modest home.
Narayana admits to owning a Bose system on which he listens to his favourite symphonies. And he uses a Nokia cell phone, a Sony VAIO notebook and a Hewlett Packard I-Pac. Pressed to identify what make of computer she uses, Sudha artlessly asks her assistant for details in Kannada - "Lakshmi, aathu yavadu model?" - before saying, "Dell. And I only use a desktop; no laptops for me." Her music system?" A simple Sony I have owned for the past 10 years; it works well." She adds, "Murthy and I are very comfortable with our lifestyle. And we don't see the need to change it now that we have money."
This extends to their children as well. "Murthy is an extraordinary father," says Sudha. He ensured there was no television in the house when the children were younger. " We only bought a TV at the end of Rohan's board exam in March 2001," Narayana says.
Instead of austerity, they expect accountability from their kids. And the common goal of bringing up their children is another "touch point" that sustains their marriage.
"I'm still inspired by the simple things in life," says Sudha. "Spending time with my family, my teaching, flowers, a walk in the park. I wake up every day with a sense of excitement." For the Murthys, their life together is a dream. And Sudha's excitement and Narayan's commitment keep it alive.
-With inputs from Ajit Saldanha in Bangalore
Featured in Harmony Magazine
0 comments:
Post a Comment